2001-09-06 - 6:14 p.m.

It seems that I am slowly just fading into the backround. Like everything I do is so meaningless. I don't know if this makes sense but it is how I feel nonetheless. Even when I feel so happy I just can't stand it I still have this underlying wish that I could just die. Why is this? It just that I feel like this is the best that there is and if this is the best... I don't know. I am so fucking scared of life, of everything. I am tired of being scared. I am tired of being me.

I won't say that I'm not happy because I am. I'm just fucked up?

regrets - hopes

the past