2002-07-11 - 4:36 p.m.

I have another job interview tomorrow for another job I don't want. Sigh.

I miss Frank so much! I wish he'd come home.

And now for another long ass survey:

01. I hurt: inside

02. I love: Frank

03. I hate: myself

04. I cry: every day

05. I fear: ending up alone

06. I hope: for peace of mind

07. I sadden: when I lose a friend

08. I feel alone: often

09. I kill: oppurtunties

10. I talk: about nothing most of the time

11. I listen: to music

12. I break: dance?

13. I see: laundry I have to fold

14. I smell: soap

15. I taste: nothing

16. I work: never

17. I remember: when I was young

18. I hold: my heart in my hands

19. I hide: when I'm sad

20. I pray: to God

21. I walk: in the rain

22. I drive: a ford tempo

23. I read: trashy romance novels

24. I burn: when frank kisses me

25. I breathe: involuntarily

26: I play: dreamphone with my sister

27. I miss: Frank

28. I touch: the keyboard

29. I want: a cigarette

30. I wish: I had a job

31. I know: that I am loved

32. I said: nothing important

33. I dream: of watercolored roses

34. I have: six dollars

36. I fall: down the stairs

37. I wait: for the phone to ring

38. I need: acceptance

39. I live: with my parents

When was the last time you ...

Smiled?: Last night

Laughed?: Last night

Cried?: Two days ago

Bought something?: yesterday,weed

Danced?:yesterday in my room

Were sarcastic?:today when I was talking to keith

Kissed someone?:Last Wednesday, kissed Frank goodbye

Talked to an ex?:Graduation

Watched your favorite movie?: Ghost World

Had a nightmare?: Can't remember

Last book you read: American Psycho

Last movie you saw: The Royal Tenembaums(parts of it anyway)

Last song you heard: a minor place-bonnie "prince" billy

Last thing you had to drink: sierra mist

Last time you showered: this morning

Last thing you ate: a popsicle, yesterday

---Body---

1. What do you most like about your body?: my hands

2. And least?: everything else

3. How many fillings do you have?: 2

4. Do you think you're good looking?: no

5. Do other people often tell you that you're good-looking?: Frank does

6. Do you look like any celebrities?: no

1. Do you wear a watch?: no

2. How many coats and jackets do you own?: 5 or 6

3. Favorite pants/skirt color?: denim

4. Most expensive item of clothing?: prom dress

5. What kind of shoes do you wear?: vans

6. Describe your style in one word: comfortable

-- Your Friends --

1. Do your friends 'know' you? Frank does

2. What do they tend to be like?:

My friends are nice and FUN!!!

3. Are there traits in you that are universally liked?: I don't think so?

4. How many people do you tell everything to?: Only Frank

-- Music/TV/Film/Books --

1. Favorite band ever?: Ever? That is to hard but for the moment belle and sebastian

2. Most listened to groups: belle and sebastian,bonnie "prince" billy,neutral milk hotel,bright eyes

3. Do you find any musicians good-looking?: yes

4. Can you play an instrument? no

5. Type of music most listened to?: I don't think there is a certain "type" I listen to more than others

6. Type never listened to?: I think I've listen to almost everything at least once

7. Favorite book?: The Bell Jar

-- Religion --

1. Do you detest religion?: no

2. How do you think this universe was formed?: I have no idea

3. If you currently follow a religion, do you think people who belong to another religion are ignorant?: NO

4. If you were in a hostage situation, and you were given a choice, to either praise the demon they follow or die, what would you choose?: death

-- Homosexuality --

1. What is the first thing you think when you see two gay guys or lesbians holding hands?: The same thing I think when I see a guy and a girl holding hands.

2. Do you detest homosexuality?: no

3. Do you agree or disagree with gay or lesbian couples bringing up children?:

agree

-- General Questions --

1. Whom do you believe is the smartest man alive at the moment?: noi fucking clue

2. What do you prefer, a sunny or rainy day?: rainy day

3. Do you consider yourself lucky?: yes

4. Do you feel sympathy for people who commit suicide?: yes

5. Choose one word to describe how you feel most often: lost

1. Do you own any plaid clothing?: yes

2. Do you own Converse shoes?: no

3. Do you own Saucony shoes?: no

4. Do you own old school Nikes?: no

5. Do you wear tight pants? no

6. Is there more than one zipper in your pants?: no

7. Do you know what a squatter flap is?: no

8. Do you own a messenger bag?: yes, a few

9. Do you wear your messenger bag across your chest?: yes

10. Do you own braces?: no

11. Are braces worn anywhere besides the mouth?: yes, but not on me

12. Do you have short, shaggy hair?: no

13. Does your hairstyle exceed a height of 3 inches?: no

14. Would you classify your hair as a deadly weapon?: no

15. Do you think mohawks are "neat"?: yes

16. Is your hair black or red?: dyed black

17. Do you have a favorite brand of hair dye?: not really

18. Do you own a bandana?: I think

19. Do you wear plugs in your ears?: no

20. Are you amused by safety pins?: of course

21. Have you ever used duct tape as a sewing substitute?: surprisingly enough yes

22. Do you own one or more objects with studs or spikes in them?: yes

23. Do you own one or more articles of clothing from Dogpile, Lip Service, or Tiger of London?: no

24. Do you enjoy leopard print?: ugh, no

Habits/beliefs

25. Are you disgruntled (having a general hate for everything)?: no

26. Are you an anarchist?: no

27. Does the American flag anger you?: no

28. Are you "working class"?: yes, if I can find a job

29. Do you dislike "preps"?: I'm out of high school now...

30. Do you dislike Hot Topic?: not really

31. Do you smoke cigarettes?: yes

32. Do you smoke cloves?: yes

33. Are you a thin waif?: I wish

34. Are you vegan/vegetarian?: no

35. Do you think meat is murder? no

36. Do your nighttime activites usually involve drunken underage vomiting?: occasionally

37. Have you ever slept in an alley or park?: not yet

38. Do you wash your hair less than once a week?: ewww, no

39. Have you ever gone a week without a shower?: no

40. Have you ever been avoided due to your odor?: no

41. Do you know who Jack Kerouac is?: yes

42. Do you like Mr. Kerouac?: yes

44. Are you a member of Makeout Club?: yes

45. Do you say "rad"?: not that I know of

Age: 18

Birthday: 6/15/1984

Sign: Gemini

Location: Kansas

School: None at the moment, Cowley County in the fall, maybe

Status: steady boyfriend

Crush: Frank

Virgin?: yes, unless you count oral

Natural hair color: dark brown

Current hair color: black

Eye color: blue-green

Height: 5'4

Birthplace: Cleburne, Texas

Shoe size: 7

Parents: Brian and Sheila

Siblings: Keith(15), Ashley(12)

Live with: parents

[favorites]

Number: 4,14

Color: gray, lavendar

Day: May 14th

Month: October

Song: hurt- NIN

Movie: Ghost World

Food: donuts!

Band: Belle and Sebastian

Season: Autumn

Sport: none

Class: History

Teacher: Mr. Buzzi

Drink: vanilla coke,coffee

Veggie: spinach

TV Show: KITH

Radio Station: 92.7 though I rarely listen to the radio

Store: DAV

Word: Charismatic

Animal: dog

Flower: rose

State: Maine

[ this or that ]

Me/You: Us

Coke/pepsi: Coke, though I tend to like them in cycles

Day/night: night

Aol/aim: AIM

Cd/cassette: CD

Jeans/khakis: jeans

Car/truck: car

Tall/short: which do I like better? It doesn't matter.

Lunch/dinner: dinner

NSYNC/BSB: NSYNC

Gap/Old Navy: neither

Lipstick/Lipgloss: lipgloss

Silver/Gold: silver

Alcohol/Weed: depends on my mood but usually alcohol

[ love and relationships ]

Do you have a bf/gf?: yes

Do you have a crush?: my boyfriend

How long have you liked him/her: since May 12th 2001

Why do you like this person?: Because they are beautiful(inside and out)

If you're single... why are you single?: N/A

How long was your longest relationship?: 14 months so far

How long was your shortest relationship?: 3 weeks

Who was your first love?: Matt Knight

What do you miss about them?: talking to them about everything

regrets - hopes

the past