2001-06-23 - 9:34 p.m.

I AM NOT OK!!!!

Once again I find myself sinking. Everyday I fall a little bit deeper. I seem unable to stop it. Damn. I am trying so hard. Slowly I feel myself drifting away from everyone. The need to cut is so strong. Someone please... help me. No one knows. Hell, no one cares. I am alone. I deserve to be alone. Lately the only thing keeping me sane is Frank.

Working is not helping me. I HATE it. Oh well... that's life. Everyone seems to expect me to work so I will. My mom keeps saying that most people don't like working. But I wonder do most people truly hate it as much as I do? I hope not. But if in fact they do how do they keep themselves from falling apart?

Help.Help.Help.

I don't want to be where I was 3 months ago. I can't deal with that again. I will keep this inside. I will not bother anyone with my pathetic and meaningless emotions.

I am sorry. Sometimes the guilt becomes overwhelming.

Help.Help.Help.

regrets - hopes

the past