2001-04-17 - 5:44 p.m.

I stayed home from school today. I slept until two. Sleep, blessed sleep. Often impossible at night. I lie there and worry about having to get up in the morning and get on with life. But today i got up and felt no desire to even try today. So I told my mom i was sick and stayed home. I slept w/out having to worry. My mind was clear, empty. Wonderful.

Tomorrow i have to go back to school and face reality and i dread it but... maybe i can tolerate it? I am scared that i will never be able to bring myself out of this hole i've dug myself into. I'll forever be stuck in this deep pit of despair.

regrets - hopes

the past