how can i convince you its me i don't like

guys hitting on me and going crazy

2001-04-16 - 9:55 p.m.

ok. i only cried twice today. Woo Hoo!

i am failing every class. how sad. haha. In chemistry i'm making a fucking 13. wow. i am a loser!

When i got home from school my dad made me change my skirt. He said it was too short. "When you are 18 you can dress like a hooker and walk the streets but right now you're changing" Bastard, it wasn't that short.

at work this guy like groped my ass. Then through the course of the night like 6 guys hit on me?! It was weird b/c i've always felt really unattractive and undesirable. But the last couple of days it seems like guys have been paying more attention to me. Have i changed in some way that i don't realize?

I think i'm losing my mind?! In class i sit there and try, really try and i just can't do anything. It is impossible to concentrate. I am so frustrated! Sometimes i feel like screaming and sometimes i do, much to my embarrassment. Why is everything so hard? I used to be semi-smart, really. Why can't i do anything anymore. Everything just blurs together and seems almost alien? Shit i am losing my mind and i can't stop it.

regrets - hopes

the past

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